Photo A Day Challenge

end of a year

We are heading into 2014... hard  to beleive how fast time is  flying by. Kennadee is  really into playing  on the playstation and callie and rakell both love  instagram and snapchat... seriously growing up way too fast to handle. I  am  really going to try to keep up with this blog thing. Mckay got me  a new big tablet and a wireless keyboard  so it should be more convenient. 

My girls bird costumes.

I'm trying to figure out how to out do last years costumes.

I can't keep up

I really need to daily post all the little things so I don't forget. Kenners is grown up and potty trained. Rakell is top of her class and getting really good at  dance too. And callie just hit the big 8 and wellbeing getting baptized in may.

December 2012

It has been a busy and very good year. We got to enjoy the girls dancing in the nutcracker. And they did amazing.... we are just about to move again.  Our landlord is losing the house so my awesome parents moved into their basement and we are going to be living in the rest of the house until we pay off all of our medical bills. Hard to believe having sick kids and being mentally ill can destroy your credit.
But oh well nothing we can do but move on and pay everything down over the next 6 months or so. 
I finally got the blog app on my phone so hopefully I will keep up more on this.  Considering I don't journal. This and facebook are the journals my kids and grandkids will have to know who I was.  I feel so blessed even though we have to leave this home that we love, we are so lucky to have giving and kind families that are always there for us. Not everybody has that and I'm afraid I too often take it for granted. 
I am loving having all 3 girls in dance they are beautiful dancers and getting better with each passing week. I'm so glad that I am done having babies and can enjoy/dread watching each of them grow and become their own individual little person.
God blessed me immensely with my little ladies and I can truthfully say after all the mental issues I've had, I would not be alive today if it weren't for their love and McKays as well. He has put up with more crap than any man should/could handle.  Yet I still feel his love burning strong.
I'm a firm believer in the fact that if you just endure through your trials you will be so blessed. Our marriage has been through the ringer no lie, but through it all love remains.  And we are more in love today than ever before

new post finally

I havent been good at this keeping up thing but i will try to summarize the past few months... Callie is now done with dance competitions for the season what a fun time watching that little performer. She was born to shine! Rakell is thriving in school she always has the kids fighting over who gets to play with her, and the funny thing is that she could care less. Poor callie tries so hard to be everyones friend and Rakell doesnt even try. She is a one of a kind kid I love her to bits. Kennadee has had a couple stays in the hospital the most recent in march was a week stay. She had rsv and pneumonia in both lungs but that kid just keeps truckin along. She is a trooper and a joy to be around. Her smile can brighten the darkest of days, which I have been having a lot of lately. I can not seem to pull out of this depression and have had the hardest time finding a doctor that can or will help. I have high hopes for my new doc but Im trying not to expect too much because that seems to always end me in a dissapointed and even lower state. I have the deepest sympathy for all those who have felt like this and I havent had the knowledge or awareness to comprehend what they are experiencing. It is a frustrating feeling to have lost all interest in being around anyone, I dont reply to texts or talk on the phone unless absolutely necessary. Im sure it makes it hard to be my friend but I also see who is a true friend and who cant handle it. I have been blessed with a tremendous support system in my life and I wouldnt be alive today were it not for the love and support from my family and friends. All I want out of life is to be able to take the kids fun places without feeling pannick, I want to date my husband again, I want to have girls nights again and be happy. I want to be able to keep my laundry done and put away and I want to feel pure joy. Seems like such a small thing to want out of life but it also seems so out of reach and out of my hands.

winter

I havent been as good about blogging as I wanted to be but here we go its a new year and new goals...I have been lacking energy and I started trying to do zumba and eat more healthy. I am tired of being tired! I want to get on the right track with my health, mentally and physically! We are planning a trip to disneyland next month and I have to get energized and fit back into my jeans. Callie and Rakell are loving school and mia and kenners are loving driving me insane!!! I have a hard time keeping up with their messes let alone be on top of dishes and the never ending overflowing laundry but i keep telling myself that it will get better as they get older. (it will right?)